Quotes Of The Week: Abbott Elementary, Stargirl, White Lotus, Titans And More

The final month of the year has, somehow, already arrived — but we've still got a few Quotes of the Week compilations left before we close out 2022.

In the list below, we've gathered more than a dozen of television's most memorable sound bites from the past seven days, including moments both scripted and unscripted from broadcast, cable and streaming series.

This time around, we've got four words of fatherly advice from Yellowstone's John, a question that only The White Lotus' Tanya McQuoid would ask, a major announcement from Titans' Tim, and an NCIS: Los Angeles bromance that's just not meant to be.

Also featured in this week's roundup: double doses of Survivor and The Sex Lives of College Girls, plus quotable moments from Abbott Elementary, Stargirl, Criminal Minds: Evolution and more shows.

Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!

"Ava, do you not have my number saved?"

"Of course not. What if I meet a better Janine?"

Ava (Janelle James) is not wasting valuable phone contact space on Janine (Quinta Brunson)

"Did you knit your little cap?"

Tanya (Jennifer Coolidge) has an important question for the yacht captain

"A million dollars for a 19-year-old kid probably wouldn't have gone to the best of things anyways. I was starting to like Teslas a lot, and my mom doesn't really like electric cars, so I think this works out better for us both."

Sami reflects on what he would've spent the money on, just minutes after his elimination

"It's like Charlie Brown trying to kick the football, and Lucy's taking it away and he's falling on his back like always. Except in this scenario, it's not just Lucy, it's Linus, and freakin' Pigpen and Peppermint Patty and the stupid kid playing the piano. It's like every single one of the Peanut kids is out to get me, and it's just like, ugh, this sucks!"

You just gotta love Owen's comparison of being on the bottom of every vote to Charlie Brown's football fiascos

"Gross! This isn't quite the cabal of evil I was expecting."

Hidden in a laundry hamper, Parker (Beth Riesgraf) spies on a men's club full of drunken, belching and freely peeing VIPs

"Your new look, Daddy? It's not an improvement."

Cindy (Meg DeLacy) prefers a lizard father to a gorilla

"Impulse control. Find some."

John (Kevin Costner) shares fatherly advice with Beth after her bar brawl

"I'll pick you up some doxycycline when I'm in town, kill whatever funk your sn—h caught in the clink."

"Thanks. Could you also get me a toothbrush? I'd hate to keep using yours."

Summer (Piper Perabo) doesn't really need any hospitality from Beth (Kelly Reilly) to make herself at home

"I would like to put your name in the hat to attend the NCIS Western Conference."

"Wow. I'm flattered you would even think of me. I mean, you have to admit that this friendship is really blossomi—"

"OK, maybe this wasn't such a good idea."

Deeks (Eric Christian Olsen) sees a bromance with Kilbride (Gerald McRaney) that perhaps isn't quite there

"This party looks sick."

"Sure does. Actually, I can't really see. Amazon Basics does not make a quality contact lens. But it's worth it to look hot."

Bela (Amrit Kaur) tries out different colored contacts

"If anyone asks, I'm at an exclusive yacht party in whatever ocean is closest."

Leighton (Reneé Rapp) makes up a cover story for while she's at a nerdy math event

"You've never pulled your gun in the line of duty, have you? Never faced down a psychopath.... You're a hedge fund manager with a badge."

Prentiss (Paget Brewster) calls 'em — in this case, FBI Deputy Director Bailey — as she sees 'em

"This is insane."

"Compared to what? Two hours ago I was in [Conner's] stomach trying to kill a ghost snake."

"And two hours before that we were fighting zombies."

"And I kissed Bernard."

Tim (Jay Lycurgo) experienced a different kind of pre-fall finale action

"We're better off with me right where I am — the thorn in your side."

"Not always."

"But just enough."

Garrett (Gregory Jbara) and Frank (Tom Selleck) make peace after locking horns all episode