Every Season Of Slow Horses, Ranked

This story contains spoilers for the Apple TV series "Slow Horses."

Tucked away down a dingy London street and in an office that's in desperate need of a scented candle is Slough House, home of the brilliant Apple TV (formerly Apple TV+) spy series, "Slow Horses." Adapted from Mick Herron's books by showrunner Will Smith, it's proved to be yet another hidden gem among plenty of others on the streaming service, after its seventh season got the go-ahead. 

Set in the unforgiving world of espionage, "Slow Horses" follows a bad batch of spies who are comprised of fall guys and failures, all sent to an MI5 off-site office to live out the rest of their ruined careers. However, even under the supervision of their stupendously sarcastic and unashamedly flatulent handler, Jackson Lamb (Gary Oldman), the group manages to find themselves caught in the middle of all manner of off-the-books operations. 

Remaining as blunt as the butt of James Bond's Walther PPK and as sharp as a "Mission: Impossible" heist, it's hard to determine just which season is better than the rest. Thankfully, we've made the assessment for ourselves. After seeing this sorry bunch of spies in action, here's our ranking of every season of "Slow Horses."

There's a lot to like about "Slow Horses" third season. The introduction of Marcus (Kadiff Kirwan), Spider (Freddie Fox) finally getting his long awaited comeuppance, and Rosalind Eleazar putting in an impressive shift as Lou, a spy with something to prove. Jack Lowden also has a lot of fun this season as the show's prime problem causer, River Cartwright, who returns to The Park (MI5 HQ) only to cause absolute chaos and get a severe beating for his troubles. Unfortunately, the issue with the third season of "Slow Horses" is that it has a great idea, but like the vengeful team at the center of the story, it isn't particularly great in its execution.

Adapting the third book in the "Slough House" series, the show follows River and company as they come up against a group trained to show the weak spots in The Park, and in turn, use the Slow Horses to achieve that. Unfortunately, how they operate is slightly lackluster. Led by the immensely underused Sope Dirisu as the Tiger team's leader Sean Donovan, most of their tactics involve parking lot meetings and holing up in a cottage. It's only in the final few episodes that the "Gangs of London" star steps up and delivers what he's clearly capable of, only to swiftly exit the show altogether. It's one of the season's biggest slipups on a list of many, and the main reason that Season 3 just doesn't hit the mark like every other season.

If there's one thing that "Slow Horses" is lethal for, it's laughs. The problem with Season 5, however, is that there are perhaps too many. Up until this most recent chapter, the balance of the humor and the spy hero stuff has been just right. That is, until the misogynistic and not so humble hacker Roddy Ho (Christopher Chung) becomes the center of this season's drama by getting himself a girlfriend. It's clear there's more to it than that from the start, and that the team's mouthiest member is getting played during an organized terrorist attack. However, the level of tension would have been so much higher if he weren't.

Now would have been the perfect time for Roddy to experience a character arc. To become a better version of himself than the sleazy keyboard cowboy who's been an eye roll-worthy weasel since the beginning. Instead, the show feels off-kilter, somehow venturing into sitcom-level laughs in between mass shootings and bomb threats. The saving grace is that we learn more about Jackson's past and have new interesting pairings following Marcus' death as a newly adjusted Slough House got into action. That said, all of it would have been a lot more effective if the show hadn't already squeezed in laughs where it didn't need them. Be that as it may, just like Lamb and his Joes, one of the worst seasons of "Slow Horses" still rivals other spy shows at their best.

It goes without saying that River Cartwright is the fallen star pupil of "Slow Horses." Why the focus would shift to him for an entire season, finally filling in his family tree of spies, is understandable. Opening with a shocking twist that has us assuming the worst (courtesy of the brilliant Jonathan Pryce as River's grandfather), the young spy is finally sent alone out in the field, only to wind up in his own backyard.

Reminding us that every so often, Apple TV's spy series can pull in some impressive talent, Hugo Weaving works perfectly as a looming threat who adds even more weight to the drama when he's revealed to be River's estranged father. Feeling almost like an existential threat to Slough House (and proving himself as such thanks to the death of Marcus), it's a great addition to this world, albeit one that steals a lot of this season's screen time. Thankfully, the fourth season also marks the arrival of the hooded itchy trigger J.K. Coe (Tom Brooke) and James Callis as a Spider-level weasel with a higher pay grade, Claude Whelan. With this and the Slow Horses doing another sterling job of dealing with the dirty work that somehow always finds its way to Lamb's desk, Season 4 is an absolute treat.

Our first trip to Slough House was always going to be etching near the top end of the ranking, and it's not just because it was where it all began. The show might've progressed with characters either leaving or dying in their five-season run so far, but it's here where the team really feels their strongest. River is still tender from getting the boot from The Park and determined to prove himself. Min (Dustin Demri-Burns), as short as his stint at Slough House was, is the washout pining for Louisa, and Roddy Ho hasn't reached his full potential of being a pompous moron. Besides all that, though, this team sticks together, bumbling and bouncing off one another brilliantly in what would be their first of many missions. It's also where casualties (including the quick and painful takedown of Olivia Cooke's Sid) and criticisms are as funny as they are often unforgiving.

Leading the charge so well is Oldman as Jackson Lamb, who is handling a role that feels like he's been wearing for decades. Dry, direct, and constantly herding a bag of calamitous cats, Lamb is a different breed of spy. Somewhere between Basil Fawlty and James Bond, Lamb parked himself down and hasn't budged since. As first seasons go, this is a perfect introduction for you to pass on to friends who might finally give in and watch the show you won't shut up about.

If we had to pick with a gun to our head while trapped in a room with Lamb after a curry, Season 2 is by far the highlight of the show so far. Daring to do what would eventually become routine for "Slow Horses," it also spends time looking into what it doesn't do enough of — leaving Jackson Lamb to work on his own and put everyone else to shame.

After spending so much time with the team together in the first season, Season 2 stretches the occupants of Slough House while also making an effort to show just why the boss of the operation is as good as he is and as closed off as he pretends to be. It might've taken five seasons to show Jackson Lamb's heart, but Season 2 gave us the first bit of proof that he actually had one after two of his own from the past and the present get taken out, courtesy of an old enemy.

This is where "Slow Horses" shines, not by letting the rejects go to work, but by spending time with the older characters to either remember old war stories or relive them to stop a new conspiracy. By doing so, it also helps the new screw-ups understand just how black and white their gray existence is, which is perfectly encapsulated by a forgotten plaque hidden away on a church wall. Well, back to work, everyone.