Quotes Of The Week For Feb. 28, 2016

castle-stephen-king-quote

"'Richard Castle and Stephen King Present....' Wish me luck, ladies."

"Darling, if you think you're going to get top billing over Stephen King, you're going to need more than luck."

Rick's dream collaboration tests Martha's (Susan Sullivan) loyalty as a mother

blackish-unarmed-quote

"According to these statistics, 25 percent of police shootings in L.A. County from 2010 to 2014 were of unarmed suspects."

"What?! The police are shooting people with no arms? Why am I just now hearing about this?!"

"No, Jack. 'Unarmed' means he didn't have a weapon."

"Of course he didn't have a weapon. He had no arms."

Andre Jr. (Marcus Scribner) and Diane (Marsai Martin) try to explain a new term to Jack (Miles Brown), with limited success

seth-meyers-melania-trump-help-me-quote

"Donald Trump's wife Melania said in a new interview that she speaks at least four languages. Melania said she's always looking for a new way to say, 'Help me.'"

izombie-between-lovers-quote

"Where were you at 8:30 this morning?"

"It's my day off, so home in bed."

"Can anyone verify that?"

"I'm currently between lovers."

Clive's (Malcolm Goodwin) murder suspect (Yves Lola St. Vil) is a kick

brooklyn-nine-nine-their-there-quote

"And you, Santiago. Maybe the world would like to see that draft of a memo you wrote, where you used t-h-e-i-r instead of t-h-e-r-e!"

"Oh, you sick son of a bitch!"

Nothing is more horrifying to Amy (Melissa Fumero) than being called out by Mean Marge (Kate Flannery) on a rare grammar mistake

supergirl-call-the-midwife-quote

"So nothing for my largesse, then?"

"I was told you asked for, and received, Netflix."

"If you thought I was dangerous before, you have no idea how dangerous I get when I'm bored."

"I recommend Call the Midwife."

Kara (Melissa Benoist) cheekily offers some TV guidance to a confined Maxwell Lord (Peter Facinelli)

supergirl-masks-in-other-city-quote

"I thought masks were only big in that other city."

With a Supergirl/The Flash crossover episode looming, Kara (Melissa Benoist) gives a nod to her CW counterparts

fresh-off-the-boat-flight-attendants-homeless-quote

"Flight attendants don't even get a seat on the plane! They walk back and forth, pushing a cart. They're the homeless of the sky!"

Jessica (Constance Wu) is less than thrilled with Emery's career assessment test results

american-crime-taylor-stole-a-gun-quote

"People are asking you, for one time, to take responsibility. Everybody else got hurt by this. Everybody but you. And you wonder why Taylor stole a gun and came here looking for you."

Coach Sullivan (Timothy Hutton) does not mince words when placing blame on Headmaster Graham for a shooting at Leland High

american-crime-story-patty-hearst-quote

"Trust me, Lee — you'll dine out on this [case] for the rest of your life."

"Yeah. But Patty Hearst paid."

Robert Shapiro (John Travolta) tries to sell the "pro" in pro bono to esteemed colleague F. Lee Bailey (Nathan Lane)

agent-carter-sisterhood-quote

"Such a pity that two accomplished women should be standing on opposite sides."

"Yes, you're such a staunch defender of the sisterhood. I can tell by the way you shot an unarmed, innocent woman."

Whitney Frost (Wynn Everett) waves the feminist flag, but Peggy (Hayley Atwell) doesn't salute

arrow-vixen-animated-quote

"Mari and I had an... animated... encounter last year."

Oliver's (Stephen Amell) introduction of Vixen to the team includes a nod to the character's CW Seed origins

jimmy-kimmel-taraji-p-henson-mean-tweet-quote

"'Taraji P. Henson seems like she's extremely ghetto in real life. lol.' Well, I can be, bitch. Meet me outside!"

The Empire actress slays (as per usual) while participating in a reading of the late-night show's popular "Mean Tweets" segment

supernatural-kansas-five-quote

"You want an L.A. 10, but you settle for a Kansas five."

Dean and Sam don't live up to a demon's (Aidan Kahn) high expectations

walking-dead-do-it-again-tomorrow-quote

"It is pretty stupid of us to go out there, isn't it?"

"Yup. Do it again tomorrow?"

"Yup."

Rick (Andrew Lincoln) and Daryl (Norman Reedus), acknowledging the foolhardiness of their excursions into the big, bad world

teachers-caroline-cancel-halloween-quote

"I'm sorry, but women should be able to dress like whores if they want! What are they gonna do next — cancel Halloween?"

Caroline (Kate Lambert) is outraged by the idea that she might get suspended from her elementary-school teaching post because of what she wore to a "pimps and hos" party

vampire-diaries-squirrels-milk-bones-quote

"Good boy. Off to dream of squirrels and milk bones."

Damon (Ian Somerhalder) tries to slow down Tyler's werewolf transition by putting him to sleep

girls-white-christian-woman-quote

"OK, well, let's just talk about the aesthetic of the wedding. We're thinking Laurel Canyon Classic, so does that mean anything to you?"

"Like a Selena Gomez kind of thing?"

"Nope, let me try that one more time. Let's do like a Ralph Lauren and Joni Mitchell — artistic, but also with a nod to my cultural heritage, which is white Christian woman. My fiancé and I, both musicians."

"OK, so Jesus. Selena Gomez meets Jesus. I can do it!"

It's not going to end well between bride Marnie (Allison Williams) and makeup/hair stylist Bebe (Bridget Everett), is it?

jane-the-virgin-right-to-make-love-quote

"I'm sorry, Susan B. Anthony, but I have to go. I'm not from this time. I was sent here to secure women's right to vote, and their right to make love."

Rogelio (Jaime Camil)'s time-traveling telenovela character has more than enough room on his plate for the suffragette movement — and the movement of suffragettes (if you catch our drift)

jane-the-virgin-sistine-chapel-quote

"Would you repaint the Sistine Chapel?"

Rose (Bridget Regan) explains why she didn't disguise herself with plastic surgery

legends-of-tomorrow-waverider-hook-up-quote

"We're aboard the Waverider to save the world, not hook up."

Ray (Brandon Routh) has clearly never seen a TV show

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