Quotes Of The Week For Oct. 20, 2019

We've rounded up the best TV quotes from Oct. 20 through Oct. 26, 2019. Scroll through our gallery of zingers, bon mots and one-liners below, then tell us if we missed any of your favorite lines from this week's television!

CHICAGO FIRE

"OK, how about these blind items? Two second shifters recently took a shower together, and not to save water."

"Severide and Kidd."

"Fine, how about this one? Late one night in the laundry room—"

"Severide and Kidd."

It's not much of a Blind Item if there's only one couple in the firehouse, Foster (Annie Ilonzeh)

SINGLE PARENTS

"Do you like living in my sauna?"

"Like it? Graham and I love it. Our pores are so open, I'm afraid our souls will escape."

Angie (Leighton Meester) is very much a fan of her unconventional digs at Douglas' (Brad Garrett) house

THE GOOD PLACE

"What in the name of Kevin Spacey's self-made Christmas Eve video message to try to get back on House of Cards is going on here?" 

Bad Place demon Shawn (Marc Evan Jackson) wants answers — and on that Spacey video, so do we

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A MILLION LITTLE THINGS

"You've gotta talk to her about this!"

"Or produce a commercial about the exact situation that you're not talking about, then have her visit the set."

Gary (James Roday) points out that Rome (Romany Malco) may not be the best person to give relationship communication advice to Eddie, given how he's handling his current situation with Regina

WATCHMEN

"How do you know he's 7K?"

"I've got a nose for white supremacy, and he smells like bleach."

Angela (Regina King) assures Judd that the guy she's got in her trunk is a skunk

GREY'S ANATOMY

"If history serves, when hard times hit, you bury yourself in a bottle of vodka or another woman — and we both know which one you can handle."

Gemma (Jasmine Guy), making an incomplete pass at fellow alcoholic Richard

HAWAII FIVE-0

"Cool, so the guy who makes mincemeat out of humans is hangry."

Tani (Meaghan Rath) finds the cupboards bare where their beastly suspect had been hiding out

SEAL TEAM

"It's just a flesh wound!"

Sonny (AJ Buckley) refuses to play dead after getting shot during a "practice"

ARROW

"So, do we text the Monitor or whatever, letting him know we have his guy...?

"I don't think he texts."

True, Mar Novu seems like more of a beeper guy

THIS IS US

"Do you think cereal is going to make me forget that you treated me like a child who can't make her own decisions about who to date?"

"That was the plan."

Deja (Lyric Ross) is too smart to get Randall'd

MIXED-ISH

"On the commune, none of this mattered. Black, white, past, present. It was all just a beautiful harmony."

"How do you still have custody of your kids?!"

A conversation between Alicia (Tika Sumpter) and Denise (Christina Anthony) about how many black women Paul dated takes a not-insignificant turn

FAMILY GUY

"You know what? I don't really get Family Guy."

"What's so hard to get? You just need to have grown up in the '80s but still be a teenager."

A focus group question inadvertently reveals the show's demographic

FAMILY GUY (Bonus Quote!)

"Many recent shows have found success by rebooting themselves as gritty, supernatural teen dramas, like Teen Wolf or Riverdale, which are watched by as many as 6,000 people a year!"

The focus group moderator explains how successful an edgy Family Guy reboot is likely to be

THE VOICE

"You're 20! Like, you haven't even drank yet!"

"Riiight."

Blake Shelton isn't nearly as sure as Gwen Stefani that a young contestant has never hit the sauce

WILL & GRACE

"You know the government's listening in. The last thing I want to do is make another donation to Mike Pence's spank bank."

Will (Eric McCormack), explaining to Grace why he's reluctant to have phone sex with long-distance fiancé McCoy

BLUE BLOODS

"You could help me open up. I know you know all the lyrics."

"Ah — in another lifetime."

A local rapper suspects Danny (Donnie Wahlberg) has the right stuff (baby)

SUPERSTORE (Bonus Quote!)

"You need to recharge a little. You don't want to end up collapsing in the store like Glenn."

"Yeah, or like falling asleep on the toilet with your underwear around your ankles, so when we find you, it looks like you passed out from pooing too hard, and then every time we look at you we're gonna think, 'Oh my God, that's the lady that pooed so hard she passed out.' Is that what you want?"

Cheyenne (Nichole Bloom) comes up with an embarrassing worst-case scenario for the sleep-deprived Amy

SUPERSTORE

"It's not fun going to a baseball game with your principal, or learning how to skip rocks from a pamphlet you had to send away for."

Dina's (Lauren Ash) childhood sounds like a real bummer