Olympics Opening Ceremonies 2018: The Best And Worst Moments

BEST WEATHER INDICATOR

The event's rapidly spreading (digital) frost conveyed the real-time temperature: 28 degrees Fahrenheit at the start, and Olympic Stadium is open to the elements. Brrr.

BEST PYROTECHNICS

Though fireworks were used frequently outside (and inside!) the stadium, the first time we saw it was the most impressive.

(See what we mean?)

CUTEST FRAMING DEVICE

Though Olympic opening ceremony intros are notoriously surreal — when something's gotta work without words, and make sense to a wide variety of cultures, things can get weird — the pre-taped bits about a group of kids who go on a winter adventure was a sweet (and normal, for the most part) touch.

Plus, check out this grandeur! (Bonus if you can spot the kiddies.)

And then some superimposed, glowing graphics led us...

... right into the stadium (and some impressive puppetry).

(Nice bird.)

MOST GRACEFUL ENTRANCE

This dancer, clad in traditional Korean dress, damn near floated onto the massive stadium floor.

WEIRDEST PUPPET

Apologies if this is some cultural character we just aren't familiar with, but why does this bird have a human face?

BEST SHOT OF THE BIG CHEESES

Thomas Bach, president of the International Olympic Committee, and South Korean President Moon Jae-in waved energetically to the crowd. (Their extended remarks, later in the event, were a little less full of pep.)

THE JC CHASEZ AWARD FOR BEING IN SYNC

These drummers sat center stage and played and moved as one...

... as scarlet-skirted dancers whirled in a giant ring around them.

Pretty rad, right?

BEST REASON WE'RE ALL HERE

And then it was time for the athletes to enter! Per tradition, Greece was first. (Birthplace of the Olympics and all that.)

BEST HEADWEAR

Most athletes wore head coverings, thanks to the cold, but we really dug Nigeria's competitors' look. 

LEAST IMAGINATIVE TEAM WEAR

Hey, TVLine is based in New York, so we appreciate a good all-black ensemble. But New Zealand (and several other nations) opting for this look seems like a missed opportunity. Not even a pop of silver? You're literally on an international stage! Go big or go home!

(This slide is just to remind you that the parade of countries went on for a long time.)

(Like, a really long time.)

BIGGEST DELEGATION

America had the largest group of athletes — 242! — at any Winter Games ever. (P.S. We're sparing you the shot of Vice President Mike Pence waving from the crowd. You're welcome.)

BEST USE OF PSY

Betcha forgot how catchy "Gangnam Style" — which came on as the Americans took the floor — is. Betcha can't get it out of your head for the rest of the day now!

BEST ADHERENCE TO TRADITION/WORST PREPARATION FOR THE WEATHER

Oh Bermuda, never stop Bermuda-ing.

WINTER GEAR WE'D LOVE TO ROCK

It was tough to choose, but we're going to give this one to Australia's silver-and-sea-green ensemble.

MOST CONFUSING LOOPHOLE

Yes, Russia has been banned from participating in the Winter Games because of rampant doping... but Russian athletes who have been deemed clean are allowed to compete as individuals under the distinction "Olympic Athlete From Russia." Their wins will not be counted toward Russia's total, and they'll always be represented by the Olympic — and not Russian — anthem and flag.

LIFE OF THE PARTY AWARD

The Jamaican athletes, who danced into the stadium, seemed to be having the most fun — and that's saying something. 

WORST SCREEN SHOT

We're sorry we didn't get a better pic of Tonga's oiled-up flagbearer, cross-country skiier Pita Taufatofua, but we're pretty sure the camera's gaze just slid off his oiled torso. 

(See? We tried.)

WINTER GEAR WE'D LOVE TO ROCK (RUNNER-UP)

Woo, Finland!

BEST HOSTS

All hail the (unified) home team!

BIGGEST SHIFT IN TONE

After the parade was over, we returned to the framing device... and things got weird.

A look into the future aged the kids and made us think about Altered Carbon and Humans, for some reason.

BEST CHANCE FOR A DISNEY LAWSUIT

The kids (de-aged) went all Elsa as they made ice figures appear out of thin air. 

BEST CHANCE OF SERIOUS NECK INJURY

The breakdancer in the middle spun on his or her head for a really, really long time.

WORST MOVIE TIE-IN

"Mister Olympics. You could have saved her. I gave you all the clues."

COOLEST LIGHT SHOW

Strands of bulbs were hoisted into the air by a near-invisible rigging, adding yet another magical layer to the proceedings.

LEAST INSPIRED MUSICAL CHOICE

Four singers crooned John Lennon's "Imagine," which is beautiful and all, but is there no other song that conveys the same sentiment but maybe hasn't been used to death?

BEST AERIAL VIEW

The ceremony gave us the bird, and we liked it.

(Not sure what this was, but it was awesome.)

BEST USE OF CREATIVE SET BUILDING

The ski slope-looking panel in one part of the stadium added visual drama to the night's events.

BEST REASON WHY WE'RE ALL HERE

"Thank God," I said to myself after more than an hour had passed, "we're almost done."

"They're not going to... are they?"

"They are!"

BEST DISPLAY OF HEALTHY HAMSTRINGS

Torch holders climbed the (probably not as steep as it looked on TV) stairs to the flame's base...

... where Korea's 2010 gold medal ice skater Yuna Kim was doing here thing ON AN ICE RINK.

(Cool, right?)

Kim was the final person to hold the torch before...

... touching the flame to a pit that then carried the fire up to the biggest (and final) cauldron.

JACKPOT.

"Oh wait, we're not done yet?"

BEST REASON TO KEEP WATCHING

These dancers were very cool, and they had the unenviable position of following the ceremony's main event.

WORST IDEA ON PAPER

This sequence featured Rollerblading fire dancers. We can only imagine what the event's insurers thought about that.

BEST IDEA IN EXECUTION

At least the images were worth it!

BEST BIG FINISH

If you're gonna go out, go out with a bang, amirite?