Quotes Of The Week: The Rookie, Sistas, Family Guy, NCIS Crossover And More

Sunday has come around once more, and so has our weekly appreciation of TV's best dialogue.

In the Quotes of the Week compilation below, we've gathered nearly 20 of television's most memorable sound bites from the past seven days, including moments both scripted and unscripted from broadcast, cable and streaming series.

This time around, we've got Zac's persuasive argument in favor of elopement on Sistas, an unexpected new hobby for The Rookie's Tim, and not one, not two, but three fourth wall-shattering moments from this week's shows, courtesy of Call Me Kat, Hunters and The Conners.

Also featured in this week's roundup: a double dose of the Jerrod Carmichael-hosted Golden Globes (including a jab from Carmichael himself), plus a rare triple appearance, this time from CBS' three-part NCIS crossover.

Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!

"I want a beautiful wedding. I want all my family and friends there. I want it to be in a church."

"Church? You don't even go to church. Your family be killing people. How is your whole family going to walk into a church, burning up like vampires in the sun?"

Fatima (Crystal Renee Hayslett) still refuses to elope, despite Zac (Devale Ellis) making a pretty solid case

"They had phones back in your day?"

"Not many. In fact, we had the only one for 300 miles. We had no one to call, but we had bragging rights. Oh, the letters I would send boasting about our telephone."

Hetty (Rebecca Wisocky) fondly remembers the good ol' days

"I found these three Golden Globes awards that Tom Cruise returned. Look, I'm just the host... but I have a pitch: I think maybe we take these three things and exchange them for the safe return of Shelly Miscavige."

"I don't know if you're clapping because you like the dress, because I'm here, or because I'm gay now, but I'll take it."

All of the above, Niecy Nash-Betts. All of the above.

"Hi, I'm Katherine, but you can call me Kat. [Turns to camera] See what I did there?"

No one has ever claimed the humor on Call Me Kat is subtle

"You look as if you've seen a ghost!"

The first line of Meyer's (Al Pacino) throwback Season 2 storyline is a wink-and-a-nod to the fact that the character died at the end of Season 1

"What about the collard greens I planted?"

"That was spinach, which is not an easy mistake to make."

Gregory (Tyler James Williams) gives Jacob's (Chris Perfetti) colossally subpar gardening skills a big (green) thumbs down

"They're fighting, they're definitely fighting."

"That's the understatement of the century. It's more like a geriatric WWE."

Kensi (Daniela Ruah) and Deeks (Eric Christian Olsen) watch Arkady's reunion with a heated old flame

"If anyone can get us off, it's you. You are quite the impressive lady litigator — better than Annalise Keating and Ally McBeal combined!"

"OK, those are TV lawyers."

"Based on real people! ... I think."

We can appreciate a good TV reference, but Leo (Greg Rikaart) is greatly overstating Sloan's (Jessica Serfaty) legal abilities here

"Where do you think we are?! Euphoria?"

Maxine (Sara Waisglass), when Marcus shows up to school drunk

"This is typical Ashley woo-woo and wear Birkenstocks. Listen, we do not need smoke and the spirits and the gods. We just need tequila."

Gizelle resists a beachside Shaman blessing meant to cleanse the women of their internal and external conflicts (of which there are many)

"Guess who's coaching Little League? Sergeant Friendly."

"How did that happ— Can I watch?"

Tim's new extracurricular activity rouses Lucy's (Melissa O'Neil) interest

"I'm sort of a photograph conservator hobbyist."

"I'm sure that's a real conversation-starter on dates."

Ernie (Jason Antoon) mock's Agent Knight's beau, Dr. Jimmy Palmer (Brian Dietzen)

"Seriously, how do you guys work here?"

"What do you mean?"

"[Jane sees Sam and Callen are serious] Ohhh, you're like the two crazy old cat ladies who don't even realize their own house smells."

"Something like that."

Tennant (Vanessa Lachey) realizes that years working out of the boat house has rendered Sam (LL Cool J) and Callen nose-blind

"I had him."

"A simple 'thank you' will suffice.'

"Mahola?"

"It's mahalo."

"I still had him."

Tennant (Vanessa Lachey) KO's Torres' (Wilmer Valderrama) opponent

"Hmm... you look like a friend of mine. Do you want to play a game?"

"No time for games! Elmo's off to get some... shortbread."

Ted Lasso— err, Elmo, can't play with Brett Goldstein before preparing biscuits for the boss

"I thought about you every day, Helen [Hunt]. You're the reason I stayed alive all these years! I never stopped loving you."

"I'm sorry. I got back together with Paul Reiser. We did a Mad About You reboot on Spectrum Originals."

"Which just sounds fake. I mean, did you watch any of that? Do you even know anyone who... like... I literally do not know one person who saw, like, a single minute of that."

No one expected that this Castaway parody would pivot into a condemnation of Mad About You's short-lived return, yet here we are

"You look really familiar."

"Excuse me?"

Former Shameless co-stars Emma Kenney and William H. Macy playfully break the fourth wall when Harris meets Dan's old high school chum Smitty for the first time