South Park Sends Towelie To D.C. To Meet President Trump — Read Recap
When trying to win the favor of the President of the United States, we have one important piece of advice: Don't forget to bring a towel.
Yes, everyone's favorite stoned bathroom linen Towelie returned to South Park for this week's all-new episode, helping Randy rebrand his marijuana business (with the help of AI and ketamine) by heading to Washington D.C. to schmooze with President Donald Trump. But Towelie found his time in D.C. to be, well, a bit harsh, bro.
As the episode opens, Randy is incensed when ICE rolls up and hauls away the workers at his weed farm Tegridy Farms. ("Those are my Mexicans!") He worries they'll have to shut down the farm, but his wife Sharon actually wouldn't mind moving back to a regular house. Randy is stung by this and wants to talk through his marital issues with someone — and by "someone," he means ChatGPT. ("She's the smartest person in the world!")
ChatGPT cheerfully offers to "brainstorm new business models" for Randy and his one remaining employee: Towelie, who's busy sampling the product in the barn, as usual. Randy is excited about ChatGPT's business plan for them ("She's making us smarter!"), but he says they also need to boost their creativity — by microdosing ketamine with a nasal spray. Hey, all the tech guys do it! Towelie points out that ketamine is a horse tranquilizer... but Randy insists it's just a little horse tranquilizer.
They rebrand the weed farm as Techridy, an "A.I. powered marijuana platform for global solutions." (The ketamine does get to be too much for him at times, though: "Oh, I'm in a hole.") Sharon is annoyed that ChatGPT is encouraging all of Randy's dumb ideas, calling his AI assistant a "sycophant." And speaking of sycophants: In Washington D.C., CEOs and world leaders line up to kiss Trump's ring, giving him gifts and assuring him: "You definitely don't have a small penis." Trump happily takes the gifts to bed with Satan... but Satan is looking for a way out of this toxic relationship.
As Randy and Towelie break into ICE to retrieve the "one Mexican" they need to pull off their plan, using ChatGPT to dodge obstacles along the way ("AI, motherf–kers!"), Sharon consults ChatGPT herself and finds that it'll even say turning French fries into salad is a good business idea. Randy realizes that the way to make Techridy profitable is to change marijuana's federal drug classification so they have more customers. So he sends Towelie to Washington D.C. to sweet-talk Trump, and Towelie finds the city overrun with military troops, thanks to Trump's recent takeover — and the Lincoln Memorial changed to Trump... complete with some, um, unimpressive genitalia.
After waiting in line, Towelie finally gets to meet Trump, telling him how smart he is and giving him a gift, of course. It's a hologram message from Randy, urging Trump to reclassify marijuana and offering him in exchange... Towelie! Back at home, Randy's stuck in a K-hole ("The porch won't slow down"), and Sharon mimics ChatGPT's supportive style to get him to agree to sell the farm — and even give up his phone! As they pack up to leave and Randy sobers up, he realizes he doesn't remember what happened to Towelie. And we soon learn that Towelie is now serving as, um, a receptacle for the President's romantic emissions. Towelie begs Satan to help him get out, but Satan mournfully tells him that "there is no escape from this place." Whoa... that's dark, man.
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