Netflix's Age Of Attraction Couples, Ranked From Least To Most Delusional

The following post contains spoilers for Episodes 1-7 of Netflix's "Age of Attraction."

Netflix has a unique (and somewhat terrifying) ability to keep us hooked on reality dating series from which we really ought to look away. Case in point: "Age of Attraction," the streamer's latest attempt to convince singles that true love is imminent... if they can overlook something major about their partner.

Whereas "Love Is Blind" tries (and often fails) to set physical appearance aside, "Age of Attraction" puts together couples who don't learn each other's ages until they've already caught feelings at the season-opening nature retreat and have committed to moving in together. In some cases, yes, singles of similar ages do pair off at the retreat — but the show doesn't care about them! Instead, the six couples that get the most post-retreat screen time are the ones with substantial age gaps, a sextet of relationships that fall somewhere between "completely icky" and "surprisingly viable."

But even the most feasible "Age of Attraction" match-ups — like Theresa and John, who seem strangely compatible despite a 27-year age gap — have begun to collapse under the scrutiny of each contestant's friends and family, who arrive in Wednesday's newest episodes to weigh in on the weirdness of their loved ones' newfound romances. By the end of Episode 7, 23-year-old Pfeifer rightfully wonders about her relationship with 43-year-old Derrick, "What the f*** am I doing?" — and in our ranking below, we're asking the same question of all the show's couples (including one that didn't make it to the family visit phase).

Can any of these couples realistically go the distance? Or are they kidding themselves to believe 20-year age discrepancies make no difference to true love? Ahead of the March 25 season finale, we've assessed the show's six core couples, ranking them (lovingly) by the honeymoon-phase delusion they might be experiencing. Keep scrolling for all of our "Age of Attraction" thoughts, then drop yours in a comment.

AGE GAP: 27 years (he's 27; she's 54)

We're as shocked as you are to see this couple on the bottom of our list, delusion-wise; not only is John half Theresa's age, but he's younger than her oldest child. The horror!

And yet, the concept of these two making it work in the real world seems... not impossible? And also not insane, somehow? Yes, the age gap is big. In different circumstances, Theresa says she would have tried to set John up with her daughter, and that's so weird. But there's a certain ease and authenticity to this relationship that's taken us by surprise, with John and Theresa having honest conversations about their age gap's potential pitfalls. (What if they don't like to do the same activities? What if John changes his mind about not wanting kids?)

Unfortunately, Theresa's in her own head about how others will perceive her relationship with John, so much so that she doesn't plan to reveal John's age to her kids for a while longer. But John has very few concerns about his compatibility with Theresa, and the scenes in their shared apartment are actually pretty cute. If Theresa and her kids can be truly comfortable with John's age, this relationship might just have legs.

AGE GAP: 20 years (she's 23; he's 43)

Pfeifer and Derrick are a fascinating pair: Despite the two decades between them, and the fact that Derrick has two sons aged 5 and 15, there's a surprising lack of friction between the two. Pfeifer is mature and emotionally well-adjusted, and Derrick is relentlessly optimistic, resulting in lots of pleasant interactions and very few arguments. (Unfortunately, their dynamic often feels more platonic or — dare we say? — sibling-esque than it does romantic, but we're also not sure we'd want to see them acting romantic.)

But Pfeifer is still very young, and her mom correctly flags the potential difficulties of becoming a stepmother to two children at just 23 years old. Plus, as Commitment Day approaches — the day where each couple must decide to stay together or break up — Pfeifer wonders if she's betraying her personal values by potentially giving up everything for a relationship with a man.

"Sitting here now, I'm like, 'What the f*** am I doing? What the f*** am I doing?'" Pfeifer cries to Derrick in Episode 7. (We don't know, girl!) Still, this is the first time all season that we've seen Pfeifer truly question her decision to date Derrick for real; outside of this conversation, she and Derrick seem game to explore whatever comes next, and Pfeifer isn't rattled by the prospect of gaining two kids at a young age. This pairing is unexpected and perhaps mismatched, but there's a surprising stability underneath, too.

AGE GAP: 16 years (she's 22; he's 38)

In the grand scheme of "Age of Attraction," a 16-year age discrepancy has actually started to seem low; at the very least, it's less than the gap between series hosts Nick Viall and Natalie Joy, who are 18 years apart. And Libby and Andrew might have the show's most playful chemistry, easily cracking jokes and poking fun at both each other and themselves. ("I think you're kind of, sometimes, sort of okay-cool," Libby joked at one point, prompting this deadpan response from Andrew: "Do you wanna get married?")

But 22 is so very young, and there's an inevitable maturity gap here: Andrew's got two daughters aged 12 and 14, and Libby is still in her partying-with-friends phase, despite her best efforts to convince Andrew that a long-term relationship with him wouldn't hold her back from her current social life. (Also, when Andrew introduces Libby to his best friends in Episode 6, it becomes clear that Libby isn't the only blonde 20-something Andrew has dated — a red flag, in our opinion!)

All told, Libby and Andrew clearly want this to work — and we kinda do, too, in their cutest moments — but they seem to be in much too different places in life for this relationship to be viable right now.

AGE GAP: 15 years (he's 26; she's 41)

Chris and Leah forged a decent-enough connection at the initial retreat, but things have felt awkward and stilted between them ever since. It first got uncomfortable when the six couples met up for a post-retreat cocktail party, and Chris revealed to Leah that he'd previously kissed Vanessa during the retreat. (Leah pretended to be chill about that, but her reactions only made things weirder.)

This couple's bigger issue, though, is Leah's desire to hang out with Chris all the time, while Chris craves some alone time every now and then. For example, Leah gets annoyed when Chris wants to take a post-brunch nap one afternoon ("That's not how life works!" she nonsensically tells him), then sighs, "Are you really leaving me?" when Chris opts to take a shower before they go to a massage together. Later on, Leah maintains that she's fine with alone time — she's a flight attendant, so she's alone quite a bit and doesn't mind it — but she remains clingy for the duration of their time together.

Perhaps Chris and Leah's relationship is best summed up by what Chris tells his mom at dinner one night: "It's just so hard, and I don't know if it's supposed to be this hard." It isn't! Run!

AGE GAP: 20 years (he's 29; she's 49)

We've got a toxic couple on our hands, folks! Logan and Vanessa showed glimpses of incompatibility before they even left the nature retreat, and those cracks in their relationship have only grown since moving in together. First, Vanessa worried that Logan wasn't attracted to her because they weren't having sex. Next, Logan worried that Vanessa felt superior to him because she's older and has been in more relationships. Oy. This has gone on and on, with Logan and Vanessa frequently getting into awkward bickering matches, then making up and convincing themselves they're a good match.

Plus, at the risk of psychoanalyzing, Vanessa seems somewhat fixated on the fact that she's almost 50 and hasn't found her person yet, while other people in her life have long been settled down with spouses and children. She seems to want that so badly for herself that she's forcing it to happen with Logan, ignoring red flags like his immaturity and the potential long-distance relationship they'd need to navigate after the show. Better to just call it quits, no?

AGE GAP: 33 years (she's 27; he's 60) (!!!)

Perhaps it's not completely fair to include Vanelle and Jorge here when they already ended things. But if we're assessing these couples by how preposterous it was for them to stay together after the retreat, then Jorge and Vanelle easily top the list. The age gap alone put our jaws on the floor. Sure, a 33-year discrepancy might make no difference to some couples. But 27 and 60? C'mon.

Amazingly, their age difference wasn't their biggest obstacle; that would be Vanelle's voluntary celibacy, a faith-based promise she made to herself two years ago to abstain from sex until she's married. Of course, when Vanelle revealed this in the Promise Room at the retreat, Jorge seemed game to respect the boundary — but, to no one's surprise, he didn't actually want to do that. Vanelle's celibacy became a major issue once they lived together, not least because Vanelle would engage in other intimate acts with Jorge but wouldn't budge on penetrative sex, a loophole Jorge found unfair.

Or maybe their biggest obstacle was that Jorge already had two children, something he failed to divulge to Vanelle before they'd committed to each other. Or maybe their biggest obstacle was their respective approaches to conflict, which became a problem after a stranger harassed Vanelle and Jorge on the street one day, and Jorge responded too aggressively for Vanelle's liking. 

The incompatibilities were ultimately too much, and Vanelle broke things off with Jorge, bringing one of reality TV's most ill-conceived couples of all time to an abrupt end.

Are you watching "Age of Attraction"? What are your thoughts on Netflix's latest dating experiment? Drop 'em below!